10,000 Foot View

I've never been one to consider myself extraordinary. I grew up in the Northwest as a pastor's kid in a wonderful family. My daddy pastored two different small churches in different areas in Oregon over the course of the 20 years we were there. We didn't have a lot of money and there were a lot of limitations on the things that we were able to do as kids. But the older I get the more I realize that what we did have was worth far more than the nice clothes and the ability to do whatever I wanted. I have been very blessed with my heritage. Not everyone gets to see two parents who love each other. Not everyone has an extended family that is always there to support you regardless of the circumstances. Not everyone gets to live in a legacy.

Not everyone had to deal with the death of a father at 23.

Not everyone had to sit back and watch as the church tore down their family.

Not everyone went through a divorce at a young age after a series of bad choices.

BUT - not everyone has been able to feel the love, grace, and acceptance of those who truly love Christ and represent His unconditional love for us. I write because I am forgiven. I continue to seek God because I know His grace to be real and redemption to be beautiful.

I am currently on a long journey back into the church. And back into a full life. None of it is pretty. I have many conflicting views and many struggles. In writing it out I hope to find some clarity in my thoughts.

Before he died my cousin Spencer wrote a song called Dancing With Wrecking Balls. We tend to go through life thinking that we're indestructible and really - life can come out of nowhere and knock you down. I have learned this lesson over and over in life. I've been hit with the wrecking balls that I created - and I've been hit with the wrecking balls that no one had control over.

This is my journey. This is me dancing with wrecking balls.